You're looking for a child, just like me.

Audiolovin' Your Eyes - Hillsong Kids

WOW. January is over already, and the second month of the year is already here. Just a brief post about things I've learned.. just steps closer to that child God wants me to be.

Judging people. Mother Theresa said, "If you judge people, you have no time to love them." How true that is! Everyone has their mistakes, weak points, and if we can't overlook those bumps and rough edges, we'll never be able to see the good side in them.

I've fallen for that trap before. I always quickly put a finger on the bad part of a person. And I fail to see the good in them. Fail to love them for who they are.

What would Jesus do. Imagine if Jesus judged us. Imagine if he only saw the negative side, and coudn't see through all the dirt and rust where the gold still remains. If he hadn't looked pass all that filth, he wouldn't of loved us, and we would be dead in our transgressions right now.

 Humbling myself. 1 Peter 5:6 was definitely the verse of the month for me. God gave me some clear directions about something he told me to do, and when I obeyed and humbled myself, he honored me. And in due time, he raised me up.. in ways I couldn't even imagine. :)

Obeying Him. Nothing counts more when you listen to that whisper.

Looking into those eyes... The years started off with lots of things I'm active in. Its really gonna be a full speed busy year ahead! God taught me that when I focus on Him, keep Him in the center of my life, He'll give me strength for everything I have to do. And when I do so, He starts this fire inside of me FOR HIM, that is indistinguishable. :D

...for a child, just like me! Best of all, I'll never forget that I was made in His image, to do His will, to be His very own child. Nothing's better knowing that someone wants you, that you are chosen! =)

Your eyes search the world over kings and queens
Looking for a child just like me.

Here I am, I'm Your child, open arms I will serve You;
Here I am, I'm Your child, all my days I will love You.

the impossible just takes a little longer

..and well, I don't act like myself anymore.
Sure, I'm still Hazel. My name hasn't changed. Neither have my looks are whatsoever. I didn't cut my hair, I didn't change anything about me.

It's just... unlike me these days. =\
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It's like I'm so busy these days doing nothing.
Serious speakin'. I feel like a totally different girl from the one I was two days ago. Yes, the girl who laughed and played with Silas and Cassia, who enjoyed the intake of fresh cold mountain air. pfftt.

Friday. Man, to tell you the truth, it was terrible. I felt like it was a Monday. And then, I couldn't relate to anyone since I didn't know what happen the whole entire week. When I mentioned to Grace that there was "badminton after school," it was obvious I was out. teehee. =) I remember having a pounding headache at the end of the day, and well.. I've been sick the last two days. =( It's depressing, it really is.

Deep down inside, I keep wondering, what am I living for? Am I living because I want to please someone? Am I just living because I can't really kill myself. Sorry for the direct language. I mean, why am I studying? Why am I pushing towards to goal of graduating when, well.. I don't know what I plan to do after I graduate. It's always been my ambition to be a nurse, but as I grow older I doubt that is what I really want to do.

What I want to do. That's it.
Isn't it suppose to be what God wants me to do? Then, why am I seeking to know my ambition, seeking to know what I'm living for.

I should be seeking for God's will in my life.
What He wants me to do.

You know I was thinking about this and well.. it came to me that there are three people in me. It sounds confusing, but it's actually very simple. There is Hazel, myself, and 'my child, Hazel'. The first one is how others, the world, sees me as. The second is what I think of myself. And the third is no other than my Heavenly father looking down from above and seeing his child as being perfect.

You know something, it doesn't matter how imperfect the world sees you as. How disappointed you are with yourself. What you think of yourself. Cause I've got news for you.. God, our Heavenly Father, is looking down at you..

..and all he sees is that his creation down there is wonderfully and perfectly made. Big smilez for that!