err, this is it.

Life is fine. I have nothing to be sad about. Nothing that I need to tell you all. Nothing heavy on my mind, heart, soul. I'm just content.. yet not.

I guess, the reality of a life in Maine that was even more gorgeous than the one in Malaysia is pulling my down. I'm literally, in other terms, homesick. Pastor Stephen was talking today about Peter crying bitterly, till no more tears came out. He then asked if anyone had experienced it. Well, indeed. I have. When I had to leave U.S.

Geeshh, I'm over it now. Seriously. I've got friends who love me, my family is still complete, and just got a grand life here. But, I miss the sun that doesn't burn, the sand in my toes, the snow on my eyelashes. The jet tubs, instead of an outdoor swimming pool, cause the water is too cold. The bike rides through my backyard lawn. The sledding into a tree. (: Man, I just miss it so much.

I just wish I could learn to love Malaysia. I wish I could find my heart, my joy again. It's like I packed my suitcase and forgot to pack my heart. It was too painful to pull out the roots, so I just left it there. So, there lies her heart in Maine.

..maybe that's what I need. I just need to love something again.