taking chances

Love is giving someone

the power to break your heart

but trusting them not to

--
This week, has been crazzyyy. Seriously. Its like, so many things happened in just the short spam of one week. Actually, I just can't wait till May 14th comes and then.. hopefully things will settle down quite a bit after that.

Speaking of May 14th...


Taming the Tiger with Tony Anthony. If you got one of these fliers, you do not want to read the back. Worse English ever, its terrible! :O Haha, but I'm sure it'll be a great event, even if the English did turn me off.


GRC Camp 2010 - give me a drumroll. I am soo excited. Its going to be possibly my last school camp for my highschool life, so that gives you a good enough reason why you should come. *Ahem cough Raquel cough Bee coughh* To find out what SOAR stands for... come for camp. :)

Both are events you so don't want to miss. (Although I am missing one.) Yea, so get your lazy bum of that seat and make sure you're coming. :D

After those two events pass, hopefully I'll get some peace.

My progress of work for the month of April has diminished. I try not to blame myself cause it really doesn't matter. My mom constantly tells me to slow down and my sister says I work too hard. Plus, I realized that quality is much more important than quantity. However, my progress chart (yes, the green paper with all the stickers) remains a sight of admiration. :P

I'm not really sure if I love my life, but I did learn in Philippians chapter 4 to be content no matter what. I'm not gonna let business, stress, and activities rob my contentment. After stating that...

Yea, I still love life. :)

HAHA is overrated.

.. so is the word 'awesome', looking perfect, and boys.

If you lost me already, you suck. :)

Fb chatting with Jon Teh. HAHA. The first name is always important. Its called Primary-Recency. Its a psychological process which influences perception. Go Essentials of Communication! :D OF COURSE MY BEAUTIFUL NAME IS #1.

Condolences to Aunty Sharon, Ry, Luke, Noah, Abel, and little Hope. I really feel for you guys but know that Uncle Alvin is in a better place and you will experience a father in Jesus. Stay strong.

So Sarah's currently at Bee's watching Dear John. ajabdjalds.

This post is messy. What to expect? My life is pretty much the same.

ohemgee. ♥

jdabdna. I need to watch this. Channing Tatum. <3

I really don't care.

♥ I like my new template. Don't you? :)
♥ My sister has this wacko plan for her birthday. And she said I was crazy. =.=
♥ 98% on my Math test, yeah. :D
♥ I like my Essentials of Communication book. It's not too hard, not too easy. &you actually learn something from it.
♥ Well, so I thought that I liked it. (Refers to above.) Till I took the LPT, and it was 7 pages long with one page entirely an ESSAY that I had to write. :O
♥ I still like it, however. ;P
♥ Boh tea with milk and plenty of sugar is to die for.
♥ I can't wait for school camp. :)
♥ HSM3
♥ Ice skatinggg.

Oh yippee for shallow points about my week. You wanna really know how my week went?
#1. I experienced a whole new definition of stress.
#2. I got ulcers as a result of that stress.
#3. I'm all jumbled up.
#4. I don't know what to do.
#5. I want to skip school for an entire week, but as my schedule is so tight, I can't even skip it for a day!
#6. Teasing is the least of my worries.
#7. Skyping is intimidating.
#8. I want to be invisible.

strength

God, give us grace to accept with serenity the things that cannot be changed, courage to change the things that can be changed, and the wisdom to distinguish one from the other.

says Reinhold Niebuhr

you step up, I'll step up too

Woah, what a week.

#o1. I burned my chin. I know, how stupid is that! I was curling my hair and thennnn.... oops. (No, its not a pimple. I still am living up to my theory that I never get pimples. :D )
#o2. The above event, and other events, proved how bimbo smart I am getting. Too much influence from the twins.
#o3. Yesterday, I was in the lift with Ry and Quel (being in a rush). We were going from the Ground Flour to Second Floor. Weellll, the lift opens at First Floor and I sprint out. Greaaatt.
#o4. Haha. Our baking expedition at Ry's was amusing.
#o5. Quel thought she left her measuring cups at school so we didn't have any measuring cups to bake with! LOL. In the end, she discovered (once she arrived home) that they were in her bag l all along. =_=
#o6. Joel and I have formed a few 'theories'. ;)
#o7. SCHOOL CAMP IS COMING UP! :) I'm in the main committee. Last camp in GRC for me, sadly. I get to go early to set up.
#o8. But I will be missing CF with Tony Anthony since I'm going early for camp.
#o9. Doo-doo-doo moments on Thursday, like Saph puts it.
#o10. Bee bee and her obsession with a certain Bible story as well as nice teeth. xD

I think I'm beginning to grow tired of school. Seriously. Its just so exasperating. The whole regular routine and people irritate me. Pfft.

letting the kite fly.

To my dear fellow GRCians and friends,

When I first joined GRC in 2007, I hated it. I really did. But somehow I managed to fit in and I felt really part of that big family. I loved my first two years there. I felt happy, carefree, and I had the older seniors who cared for me and did all the leading.

Last year, reality struck. Those beautiful, God-fearing, loving, leaders of ours had to leave and move on with life. As they slowly passed down more and more responsibilities to the younger ones, I began to take on more leadership myself.

I had this huge dream that slowly crept up from somewhere deep within me. I wanted to be different. I wanted to be a leader that everyone would love, respect, and look up too. I wanted to be everybody’s friend. I wanted to be a role model for all of you.

Months passed quickly as I slowly tried to balance out work and activities. It was hard. I knew I had to focus on my work but I never forgot that dream. I tried so hard to be that perfect girl.

One day, I found the key. Love. As simple as that. No one can help themselves when someone loves them. You just have to love back. You start respecting that person. You want to be with that person every minute, every moment. True, sincere love.

Of course, I didn’t achieve that straight away. I hated a lot of people at that time. I always felt like killing one person or another. I judged many of you.

But you know what I found out? God answers prayers. I asked him to put into me a love for you all that was so great. And He really did. He taught me how to love Him first, and then once I achieved that, I began to love you guys.

And then I asked for something, I asked God to put a burden in my heart for you.

He did.

I almost feel like regretting that request. But I’m glad too. Because I not only love you guys so much, I now also feel like I’m responsible for you all.

I’m sad for you when you speak badly about your fellow peer. That is, the one who did the speaking behind the back, not the one who is talked badly about. I feel like everyone deserves a second chance whenever they get classified as “weird”. I’m so burdened when I can’t see you guys growing in the Lord. It’s so sad when I can’t see any fire for the Lord inside of you guys. I shake my head at the continuous arguments and hatred between you and your friends. I feel like screaming out to you, “CHILDREN! LOVE ONE ANOTHER!”

And when I see all this, I realize that I didn’t do a good job at all. No. I’ve failed at being a leader. I’ve failed at trying to be an example. Because if I had achieved that dream of mine, you guys would be great people too.

Hey, I’m not gonna give up yet. I see so much potential inside many of you. I know you guys will be great leaders and great people of influence some day. I believe in you all.

I guess I’ve just been trying too hard.

Just yesterday, I realized it’s time to let go. It’s like I’m holding the kite, but I’m not releasing enough string. Sure, I’ll still be there to support you; I’ll still be that string on that kite, keeping you guys from straying too far. I’ll guide you, pray for you, but you got to do the flying.

I never thought my time to step down would come so soon, but it has… and I have to let go. Although I’m uncertain about the future, and sometimes I just wish I could stay in high school forever, I’m sure about one thing. My time is over with you guys. My only hope now is that, hopefully I’ve deposited something in your life that will count. Hopefully, I’ve left a good memory. A kind word, an encouraging one. Hopefully, I’ve made some difference in your life.

And if I haven’t, then I’ve truly failed. And I’m sorry.

I love you guys so much. Every single one of you. Not just the ones I’ve known for 4 years. Not just the ones I spend most of my time with. I love you even if I’ve just met you. All of you have taught me the greatest lesson. You might be unaware of it, but I thank you for being part of my life.

I’m gonna treasure every second of the last 8 months or so with you.
I’m gonna try one more time to achieve that dream.
And maybe, just maybe, I’ll succeed. :)

Above All

Like a rose, trampled on the ground

You took the fall and thought of me

Above All

the "long" and "narrow" way

j(o.o)el says:
*i mean like. the Bible says we should take the long and narrow path. not the short and wide one. right? i think it's something like that.
*so SHORTCUTS.
*are like.
*the short and wide one.
*it will lead you.
*to your.
*DOOM
hazelchazel™ says:
*ITS NOT LONG AND NARROW
*HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH
*OMGG
*SOOO HILARIOUSS
j(o.o)el says:
*DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMM
hazelchazel™  says:
*ITS NARROW AND SMALL
*NOT LONGG
*HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Pure LOLness. He is so retarded. xD

Friday, and thankyous.

It feels like a Saturday, huh? I was about to hit the sack when I realized that tomorrow's not gonna be Sunday. Its Saturday tomorrow. Today is Friday.

This isn't an everyday Friday either. It's called Good Friday. About 2000 years ago, people didn't really think it as a good Friday. Only 3 days after, they realized how "GOOD" that Friday was. I think good is too simple of a word to describe it. It's indescribable. Amazing, incredible.

But if I didn't know that my Lord didn't resurrect in three days, it wouldn't be a good Friday at all.  Putting myself in Jesus' time, about 2000 years ago, I would be devastated.

If I were living during those times, I probably would of cried a million tears. My Lord is hanging on that cross, after being beaten to rags, scorned and spit on, and totally humiliated. As I watch, I would wonder why. What did my Savior do to deserve all this? What was happening? Maybe doubt was traveling through my mind. Is he really, truly, God? Was he the Messiah?

No, indeed. That was not a Good Friday.

Years later, we call it Good Friday because of the unconditional expression of love shown on that cross. Its truly amazing. I lose my breath every single time I think about it. Here I am, living my life, ungodly compared to how Jesus would truly want me to live life - yet He died for me!

I feel like the most unworthy person. I deserve to be dead, burning in hell. I don't deserve such a bountiful life which I live now. Why am I still living?

Because He loved me.

So many times, I dream about finding my future husband who will love the life out of me. Surely it would be my husband-to-be that will love me the most. But no. I realized that love is truly defined by the love that Christ has for me. It is soo HUGE. Its like, he's in love with me. And, honestly, I wonder why.

Thank you Jesus, for loving me. I am far from the most perfect girl on earth. I am not the most beautiful girl either. I make mistakes, I screw up, I hurt others, I am selfish. Yet you still love me.

Thank you Jesus, for giving friends and a family whom I can learn to love because You loved me. Although everyone has their bad points, and sometimes its hard to love when you feel like, "S/HE IS SOOOO IRRITATING", You loving them and You loving me, is a good enough reason why I should love them.

Thank you, beaucoup. :)